There is no way he is gay with that hair.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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