Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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