is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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