I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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