I think I just saw someone hide a body.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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