guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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