dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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