and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
He did a backflip because drugs
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