I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
