is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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