i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
