i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
