yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
