So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
