i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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