I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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