Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
