Define "chronic" masturbator.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
