when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
