Whod you bang
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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