i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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