You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
