Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize