So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize
