Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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