I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
