I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
