so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
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