Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(714): View more from California

she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK

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(847): View more from Illinois

And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club

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(309): View more from Illinois

with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.

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(619): View more from California

Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.

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(917): View more from New York City

she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.

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(443): View more from Maryland

Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.

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(712): View more from Iowa

If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.

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