I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
