I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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