Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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