I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
