I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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