Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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