If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
