I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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