Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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