eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
