is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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