Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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