I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
