Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
