just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
