You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
