Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
