The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
wow bdsm is so cute
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
