Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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