He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
