We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
