just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
