Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
